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(Copy and pasted from fb, not the easiest to read, my apologies.)
18 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
i see youre working hard on your essay
16 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
Yeah
Almost half way there
16 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I'm just not in a good mood I guess.
15 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
reason?
15 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I just can't help it Troy. I'm not over it
14 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
It almost sounds like youre apologizing to me. This was never going to be easy. You just have to stay strong. And you have been. You've been so strong, Mary.
13 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I just want it to be over already. I don't want to care anymore and I don't want to cry and feel sad all the time.
12 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
Mary
12 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I'm sad all of the freaking time over this.
12 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
You don't need to be sad
11 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
Like, I seriously cant go twenty minutes without thinking about it.
11 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
You dont need him anymore. You have someone better to replace him.
11 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
?
I know I don't need him.
It just hurts.
It hurts to know I was right the entire time.
It hurts to know that I wasn't good enough.
It hurts that I opened up and let myself truly care about someone only for them to turn around and hurt me in the wrost ways.
*worst
7 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
Without the physical stuff, you have me. You always will. I will never hurt you. I'll never abandon you. I'll never let you care about me without giving you as much or more care in return. I'll always be your shoulder to cry on. And I'll protect you, better than he ever could. I'll guide you when you're lost. I know that's still not enough.. but it's what I'm going to give you. Whether you want it or not.
5 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I am so utterly thankful for you Troy. I don't know if I could have dealt with all of this without your help. You're always my shoulder when I need one.
I just get so lost in it because I've never been hurt this way.
2 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
I know. It's a cheap shot. He made you so vulnerable and he, intentionally or not, brought you down and continued to hit you while you were on the ground. I resent him. I regret the fact that he exists.
.
about a minute ago
Mary McMahan
I don't know what to do anymore.
I've tried to erase him the best i can, but it just doesn't work.
8 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
Time will heal it. Time. And continuing to tell yourself how much better you are.
I think about him too, you know.
7 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
He's already moved on by the looks of it.
5 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
Fine. So he's moved on. Because he's a fucking prick. He's such the lesser man. You deserve SO much better. So so so so so much better.
5 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
It still doesn't make me feel good.
Troy Ellis
I know. It's unsettling, to say the least. That he's moved on. Its actually confusing to me.. I mean, I don't really understand how someone could just move on from You. Such a beautiful girl, who's smile always makes me feel better. A girl who has so many talents, hell she was on practically every page of her high school year book because she's so badass talented. A girl who will make adjustments to her day just to see the one she cares about, even knowing he was probably going to blow her off she still always gave him that chance. She's so intelligent. He's a fool for getting over her so quick. I don't think he realizes that she's going to be making a better salary than he will once theyre out in the real world. Maybe he should have played his cards right.. But he didn't. And now and into the future he will be missing out on you. A girl who is going so many places. A girl who takes such great care of herself. A girl who's so fucking tough it impresses me. No, Mary, it's nothing you should hold against yourself. This is all him, making huge mistake after huge mistake. Being such a fucking idiot as to not recognize how lucky he was all of those months. He threw it away. Good riddance to him. You're better than that. Don't let him upset you just because he's moved on. He's worthless.
6 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
Thank you so much Troy. I needed that.
5 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
I mean every word.
5 minutes ago
Mary McMahan
I know you do, which is why it means so much to me.
Thank you so so much Troy. I feel so much better
2 minutes ago
Troy Ellis
Of course Mary. It's all I want for you. To feel better, and to be happy.
about a minute ago
Mary McMahan
You're the best best friend a girl could ask for. I am so thankful that we've gotten close this year.
You should go to sleep and I should do my essay. Thank you Troy for listening to me.
Goodnight and sweet dreams
18 seconds ago
Troy Ellis
Any time Mary. I am so glad to know such a special person. I shall sleep now. You, good luck on your essay. I'll see you tomorrow at 12: 20
I am kind of awesome. And ridiculously strong.
I love Troy so much, he really has been my shoulder through this entire thing. I am so utterly thankful for his love and friendship.

Apr

02

#seriously #ugh #justdoesntexistanymore

(Source: lindseymariepatkos)

11 Notes

Apr

02

LOLOLOLOL.

Mar

12

No I.

Feb

05

fsgbooks:

An early draft of Walt Whitman’s poem “O Captain! My Captain!” (from the Library of Congress). How many other documents so exemplify the nexus of poetry and American history?

72 Notes

Feb

05

If My Heart.

towersofoberon:

If my heart was a mirror,

It’d be smashed on the floor.

Broke into pieces,

Cause you walked out the door.

If my heart was a tree,

It would be bare.

The leaves would have wilted,

Cause I fell for your snare.

If my heart was a flower,

The petals would have blown away.

Ripped of by the gale,

Of your cold heart’s decay.

And if my heart was whole,

It’d be because you were here.

But that ain’t gonna happen,

Not in a million years.

8 Notes

Jan

18

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_lJiwKskTlE

I love this song. Her voice is so beautiful, in that sort of haunting-ly fantastic way.

So I’m not going to lie, the past week has been hard.

I know I did the right thing by walking away, or so that’s what I tell myself.
Everyone tells me I deserve better anyway, and I agree.
I just wish he could have been the person I fell in love with instead of person he became.
I think it’s hard to let go of hope; but I am so TIRED of hoping he means it when he says he’s changed. Because it’s a lie every single time.
I’m not stupid. I know he is a liar. I know he’s a cheat. I know he isn’t the guy he pretended to be.
I just would like an apology, just to know he at least feels some remorse.
Because I don’t understand how you can care about someone for almost two years, tell me you’ve never loved someone as much as you loved me, just to break my heart over and over again each time swearing you’re different and you need me.

And yet I still miss you.

I don’t get it. I probably will never get the answers either.
I just know that I want to be a good woman.

And some day I want you to wake up and be a good man.

3 Notes